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A Valentine's discussion at Fair Oaks

Lorraine Brill and Stanley Windels were crowned Valentine's Day royalty.

Valentine's Day took top spot this week a Fair Oaks Lodge. Dick Johnson of Verndale and several of his friends provided music for the afternoon before a colorful Valentine's Day lunch was served.

Loads of Valentine's Day lore fill pages. No matter how much stories or details differ, an expression of love is always the main theme.

The best gift given this year has to be the gift of one of her kidneys that Amy Anderson presented to her betrothed, Ron Spanier. Voted the worst gift, hands down, was the workout video.

When the young men in a college were asked what question they would most like to ask their ladies, their answer had nothing to do with Valentines. They wanted to know, "Why do you wear those awful shoes that cripple your feet?"

The worst Valentine's Day massacre was when Al Capone and his West Side Chicago pals were machine gunned down gangland-style. All seven were lined up and shot in the back by the North Side Irish Gang in 1929.

Trivia is that 15 percent of the women send themselves cards and candy on Valentine's Day, that one billion cards are exchanged, and 3 percent send their pets cards.

A particularly vicious type of greeting, called Vinegar Cards, or Penny Dreadfuls, surfaced for a time then pulled off the market in the 1930s. A vinegar card might read something like "Roses are red/ Violets are blue/ No-one I know/ Is as stupid as you." They were heart-breakers and didn't last long.

Stanley Windels and Lorraine Brill were chosen this year as King and Queen Valentine's Day royalty. Stan attended District 92 in Bluffton Township. It was above average, as country schools run, with a full basement that held the big wood furnace, and chemical toilets. An early favorite teacher was Don Larson.

There was a neat little library in one corner of the school. At some time in those first years a donor made the school a gift of a set of 1920 encyclopedias in a cabinet. Stan took them hone, one at a time, until he knows he read every word in the set.

Before Valentine's Day arrived the kids covered a box with white tissue paper trimmed in red hearts. They thought it was grand, the prettiest thing ever. The kids all made their own Valentines. On party day the teacher passed out cookies, Kool Aid, and maybe a piece or two (no more) of candy.

Lorraine's Valentine experience was just as memorable on a smaller scale, what with only six pupils, at best there was nine. A cardboard box was colored. Then each made their own Valentines. She remembers the stress of printing the exact right words on them or get teased unmercifully the rest of the year.

Heaven help the poor girl who sent out a wild card that had the word "love" in it, or worse yet, "will you be mine?" A card that read like this one would never have made it: "My love for you is like a cabbage/ Divided into two/ The leaves I give to others/ The heart I give to you."

Looking over our collection of somewhat tired Lotharios, I ditched the idea of asking them if they recalled giving that first kiss in favor of refreshing their memories.

The information I found suggests something like this: Plan to be alone with your girl, NOT on a day you've had onions for lunch. Don't ask her if you can kiss her, surprise her before she can say no. Keep your eyes closed. Above all, DON'T miss and kiss her nose. They hate that.